Have you ever had an emergency come up that was someone elses fault? Probably many times.
Yesterday my daughter called me wanting to come home from college. She’s only been there 3 days. Of course classes haven’t started yet, and she realized she had forgotten some items she would like to have. She’s a freshman and of course doesn’t have a car. I had told here anytime she wanted to, I would make sure she got home. I suppose I should have said “with notice.”
First of all, it was planned she come home on Sunday for church anyway, as classes start on the following day. Her sister is there too, has her car, and so they planned to come home together. But she “needed” her things before Sunday and couldn’t wait. There was nothing that couldn’t wait, just a few things she wanted. Unfortunately, for her, I already had appointments scheduled and could not just drop what I was doing and go get her. It is almost an hour one way. So my reply to her request was of course, “Sorry, I’m busy. I can’t do it on this short a notice.” That was not the answer she wanted to hear.
I went about my day. I had a presentation I was to give at 6pm to a ladies networking group. Shortly after the meeting got underway, I received a text from her saying, “I’m home, where are you and when will you be home?” My reply was that I was at a networking meeting and I wouldn’t be home til about 10pm. Her reply? “OH” She was obviously disappointed. She ended up going to dinner with a friend, and not eating that home cooked meal she may have been craving. Anyway, when I got home, I found out that her room mate’s mother is the one who drove down to get her and her room mate. She was not pleased, but non the less, she did go and get them. The plan was for her to take them back at 7:30am the next morning, get back in time to get to work. The girls had a freshmen meeting at 9 they were to attend. The plan sounded good.
As with all good plans of mice and men, something didn’t go as planned. 7am the next morning arrived and her room mate called and said she when out of town the night before and had over slept. She was still better than an hour away from home and would obviously be late. My husband and I both had early morning appointments and could not cancel to take her back in time to make her meeting. Now her friend had done something that would become her problem too. First mistake, lack of planning. Second mistake, lack of responsibility. When others are involved, your decisions are very important.
They decided to just forget about the freshman meeting and try to find out the information from other attendees. Ok, that’s covered. But what about how they were going to get home now?
Her room mate’s mother had to be at work. I was a possibility, but she wasn’t about to ask me because she knew I was rather unhappy with her decision in the first place. So it looked like the only way they would get back to school was to wait till the other mom got off work, or for me to work something out.
So I decided to re-arrange my schedule a bit and try to get them back to B-town. Ok, I did feel a bit like I should share in the responsibility in getting them back. After all, the other mom had gotten them home, the least I could do was be the one to get them back.
So, I called the other mom and we had a conversation about what had happened. We both agreed, they didn’t plan very well, and that their decisions had effected other people to the degree that they needed to learn from this series of events. So we decided to let them know that we were not happy with them, and that we would always be there for them if there was an emergency, but this spur of the moment stuff would not be a priority on our part ever again.
In other words, and let this be one of life’s little lessons to all out there that maybe haven’t learned this one yet… ” LACK OF PLANNING ON YOUR PART DOES NOT CONSTITUTE AN EMERGENCY ON MINE!”
I’ll always be there for you as long as you’re not taking advantage of me in the process. But always know, no matter what, I still love you, and always will.
I pray for all freshmen attending college this year, may you learn quickly and painlessly that a well thought out plan is vital to your survival. May God be with you and teach you that others are just as important as you are. May He watch over each and every one of you so that when you do get in a bind, and it will happen, He will put solutions in front of you that create positive learning experiences each and every day. May God help you to learn well, laugh often, love everyone, and think before you act. Bless you all. AMEN
